Psalm 35:1-10 Contend, O Lord...

Observation: It's not uncommon for a psalmist to ask God to take a side against an enemy, and promise to share good news of God's deliverance in return. That's exactly what Psalm 35 says. 

Application: No way around it...this doesn't fit with my commitment to follow Jesus' teachings, "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." This is exactly the opposite! It's texts like this that give me a sense of relief that I don't worship the Bible, I worship God revealed in Jesus Christ. When in doubt, I follow him. 

Still, something I can gain from this is a reminder: as violent as the world of the Bible is, it is much more common even in the Old Testament to ask God to settle a score than to advocate proactively settling it oneself. While I can't see myself ever praying for the demise of an enemy, this Psalm sets a helpful example of putting Justice in God's hands rather than repaying evil for evil. In the cases where we just can't pray for our enemies, maybe at least praying they get caught in their own nets is better than trying to beat them at their own game. That's what I've got today. 

Prayer: God, bless my enemies. Turn the hearts of those who wish me harm. And on the days when I can't bring myself to pray for them, help me at least turn to you instead of living their way. Amen. 

Numbers 22:22-28 Lashing Out

Observation: King Balak has commissioned the prophet Balaam to come to him and curse the Israelites so they don't invade his land. God gets angry at Balaam for going to the king so he sets an angel in his donkey's path, which only the donkey can see. Every time the donkey stops, Balaam beats it, until God allows it to speak and defend itself. Weird story.

Application: On a literal level, this story reminds me that God has a unique relationship to the creation and God cares about animals just as God cares about humans. God calls the donkey to speak the truth to a powerful prophet.  I appreciate seeing Balaam's cruelty to his donkey called out in this text, ancient though it may be. 

On a more figurative level, I appreciate seeing the truth laid out, that sometimes power, and the potential to get more of it, can blind us to problems right in front of our faces. And heaven forbid if someone with less power points out the problem: more than likely they'll be punished rather than thanked. Truth is truth, no matter who sees it first. Right is right, no matter whose idea it is at first. We can only see what God wants us to see when we commit to stop seeing only what we want to see, and listen to those who others ignore. 

Prayer: God, open my eyes and ears for what I couldn't or wouldn't see yesterday. Help me set aside my ego and hear the witness of the powerless. Amen. 

Psalm 111: God's Word for When I'm not Feeling It

Observation: This is a psalm of pure praise for al that God has done. God's name is holy and awesome, God's deeds are renowned throughout the earth, God's teachings are trustworthy, God is just good, all the time.

Application: Some days a reading just strikes you as so cogent, so appropriate to your situation that it blows you away. Today is NOT one of those days. I am not feeling like praising God's power and might and wonderful deeds this morning--not because I don't believe in them, but because this morning, I'm grieving the loss of a good friend. Sarah Ehrman Merriken, a fellow graduate of Trinity seminary and fellow mentor in the Delaware/Maryland LYO, a woman who was truly gifted in welcoming the stranger and discipling young people to do the same, yet who always managed to do so with a twinkle in her eye and a snarky joke from time to time, lost her life to cancer yesterday. She was my age. I'm praying for her husband, her family and so many others who were close to her. It does not seem right, or fair, or just, and I am in no mood for a psalm of ultimate praise today. For those of us who knew, loved and valued Sarah, it does not feel like today is our day, nor Psalm 111 our psalm. 

With our youth group in Lake Ann, we've been studying Dietrich Bonhoeffer's Life Together. I read it years ago in seminary, and something Bonhoeffer said about the psalms has stuck with me and grabbed me again as I was reading it. Essentially he said that as we pray the psalms, we pray the prayers of Christ. Jesus prayed the psalms every day, and now that he has borne all our sufferings, he can relate to any of the sufferings found there in the psalms, as well as any of the praise, because he is risen. Also, Bonhoeffer wrote about how if a psalm doesn't seem to fit your individual life experience today, you can bet it will fit someone else's, so as part of the church across space and time, you can pray it for them. 

So I can tell that Psalm 111 isn't my psalm today. I'm not feeling it. But as I think of it, I remember that Sarah has now attained the promise of Christ's resurrection, and in a way, this could be her song today. The pain is gone. The healing and new life has come. 

"God has gained renown by God's wonderful deeds, the Lord is gracious and merciful." 

Thanks be to God for Sarah, and for all God has done for us, especially in the death and resurrection of Jesus, our Savior. 

My prayer today will be from a song well known to youth and mentors in Delaware and Maryland, and probably beyond. 

Praise our God

for God is good

Praise our God 

for God is good

He has done for me

He has done for you

He has done for us

Come and listen

Come and listen to what he's done

Come and listen

Come and listen to what he's done.  

Acts 9:1-18 "I Have Heard From Many..."

Observation: When Saul is struck blind by the Risen Jesus on the road to Damascus, he finally begins to see the truth of Jesus' identity as son of God. You can see his dawning realization in his words, "Who are you, Lord?" He addresses Jesus as Lord, even while still not ready to see that this "Lord" is Jesus. On the other hand, Ananias, a Christian leader who saw the truth of Jesus' identity from the beginning,  is blinded to God's purposes for Saul. He can't see how God can possibly take a violent persecutor of the church and turn him into a key evangelist. But really...can you blame him? 

Application: You can tell Ananias has been in the church a while because he already knows a Christian leader's five least favorite words, "I have heard from many..." Usually, when someone in a church comes with words like these--"A lot of people have been saying", or "I've heard several people complain"--that is usually a way of validating their own concern and resistance to a change. The concern may indeed be legitimate, and you have to admit Ananias' was, but we tend to hide behind a perceived consensus of others we've talked to (even if the conversation went like, "Hey, don't you agree with my opinion that..." and the other people just nodding their heads!). It's hard to be vulnerable sometimes and own up to our own concerns, our own fears. And it's hard to admit sometimes when our fears prevent us from seeing new possibilities. 

Saul was always a long shot. He was a sanctimonious, judgmental know-it-all who breathed threats and murder against God's people. But God saw in him what no one else could--that he was ready to be our sanctimonious, judgmental know-it-all, self-identified as "least" of the apostles, yet first to proclaim God's amazing grace for all of us sinners, Gentile and Jew alike. It's no wonder we couldn't see it at first. But we shouldn't be surprised that God, who looked at the chaotic deeps and saw the creation it would become, could look at this man and see St. Paul just fine. 

Prayer: God, thank you for the ministry of Saul of Tarsus, our brother and proclaimer of the Gospel of your grace. Help us to see others as you see them, with great potential to teach us new things about you.  Amen.    

Mark 3:13-19a Jesus Plays Favorites

Observation: Jesus calls twelve guys to his side and calls them "apostles" (Which is Greek for "sent ones") giving them authority to do pretty much exactly what he's doing: share the message about God's kingdom, and cast out demons.

Application: First, I still have some culture shock about the fact that Jesus calls only dudes to his side. No women.  Argh. Yes, it was the first century, I can't expect things to be done in a completely equitable twenty-first century way, but it's still something I have to get over to get anything out of this message. I'm just glad that in our own time Jesus has called a great many women apostles, some of whom have helped form me in faith.  

But after I get over that, what stands between this text and me is how profoundly undemocratic Jesus' method seems to be. No try-outs, no master class, just a small group of special people whom Jesus hand-picks for intensive learning and service. How do you think the people who weren't picked feel? Aren't we all God's children? Why them? Why not me? 

I've had similar complaints about many small-group discipleship ministries that purport to be based on Jesus' method. They seem to create cliques, or different "levels" of Christian, an "in" crowd and an "out" crowd. Even 3DM, the discipleship model which has formed and changed my spiritual life and ministry, is not immune to that criticism. 

What I've learned, however, is that a supposedly "democratic" model of Christian leadership which seems the de facto model in congregations, which opens every opportunity to everybody, in which everybody is welcome (and sometimes begged) to do everything, does not really offer spiritual growth to anybody. Signing up on a sign-up sheet for a ministry or learning opportunity, and showing up when you have nothing better to do, will do precious little to unlock the spiritual gifts God has given you, nor serve the world in its deepest need. 

Real discipleship, like Jesus practiced, is about deepening relationships. It works on the assumption that you can only empower people to do what you're doing if you feel mutually called to work together. It doesn't happen by accident. Jesus recognized specific gifts in specific people, and he knew that working more intensively with them would mean they could become effective leaders, who would in turn call disciples who would become effective leaders in their own right. Sure, Jesus, being the son of God, could probably could have just "downloaded" heavenly wisdom into 5,000 people on the hillside and made them all stellar disciples. But what would have happened when all 5,000 of them died, without knowing how to disciple others? 

Those of us who have been baptized into Christ, and those of us on a journey of following him, are here because Jesus "played favorites." He didn't treat his disciples with any more love than anybody else--if anything, he expected a whole lot more of them--but he did understand that these were the guys God had called to work by his side. And I guess we can be thankful that he didn't just put out a sign-up sheet or create a Facebook event. Movements of the Spirit rarely form that way. 

Prayer: Jesus, I pray you would call me into deeper discipleship. I am sort of charting my own course right now, and frankly I could use more structure. Maybe some reading this could use the same thing. I pray you would call spiritual mentors, and groups of fellow-travelers, for us who need it, and for those already in those relationships, may they bear the fruit that is needed to serve your world. Amen.  

Genesis 45:25-46:7 The Spirit Revived

Observation: Near the end of the Joseph story Jacob finds out from his sons that Joseph, whom he believed was dead, is not only alive but ruler of Egypt, and in a position to save his entire family from starvation. When Jacob finds this out, the text says his "spirit revived within him." 

Application: It's helpful to know that the same Hebrew word can mean either "breath", "wind", or "spirit." The idea was that your "spirit" in a sense was your breath: your vitality, your energy to get up and go. In Hebrew thought there was less of a distinction between our bodies and our "spirits." We have some intuitive sense of this in English when a piece of bad news can "knock the wind out of you" or a piece of exciting news can "put the wind back in your sails". 

This story reminds me that sometimes grief can sap our spirits without our even knowing it. Jacob had been going through the motions of life for years by this point, but always part of his bandwidth--his life force, his spirit--was devoted to mourning his lost son. When he finds out Joseph is alive, that energy comes back, and like Popeye eating his spinach, Jacob is revived and fully himself again. 

In many cases, grief doesn't have such an easy fix. As much as we want it, we will not wake up one morning to find a loved one alive again, like Jacob did. Grief is a new normal; it's forming a new life without that special person. But I do believe that eventually, with a lot of hard work and a good network of friends, family and spiritual care, our spirits can revive again. We can get our breath again, though the path forward will look different than we ever expected. We can return to full bandwidth, changed though we may be, remembering the promise that God's Spirit--the breath breathed over the waters at creation, and breathed into the lungs of Jesus to raise him to life--can revive us and our loved ones when the time is right. Nothing is truly lost which belongs to God. Let this promise revive us always. 

Prayer: God, for those who are grieving, despairing, or in any other way out of breath, for those who need your Spirit of life, breathe on us and revive us. Amen. 

Jeremiah 20:7-13 Caught by the Truth

Observation: Jeremiah is facing major resistance from the ruling class in Jerusalem because of his prophetic message. He laments in shocking words: he accuses God of "enticing" and even "overpowering" him with this prophetic call. Even when he tries to stay silent, God's word is like "fire shut up in my bones". Now that he has begun speaking God's truth, trying to hold it in is exhausting.

Application: Jesus says "the truth will set you free." I believe that, but in other ways, the truth can hold us captive. We can't unlearn what we have learned, and some truths are much less pleasant than the lie society tells us. 

In the wake of so many accusations of prominent men sexually assaulting women, the truth is becoming clear: that our culture as a whole needs to examine how we are raising our boys, and be even more forceful in asserting that each person's body is her/his own. This is the work of generations, and we are not nearly as far along as we think. 

As we reflect on the legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr., another uncomfortable truth is that racism is far from dead in our society, and instead white supremacist organizations are increasingly in the spotlight. Racist language and attitudes are still all too common, even among the younger generations.  

These are just two uncomfortable truths being told, and resisted, in the public sphere. Uncomfortable as they are, for those affected by them, they are inescapable. They are caught, as in a net, knowing they, too, are made in God's image, yet are not being treated as fully human. There is no escape rom this reality. Certainly, it would be "easier" for those not affected, to ask that these folks remain silent.  To question their motives. To tell them it's all in their head. But for those who have to live with his truth every day, whether they like it or not, silence can be harmful and even deadly. As with Jeremiah, it is fire shut up in their bones. And rather than keep a lid on it and suffer for the sake of those who don't want to hear it, more and more people are asking that everybody "suffer" a little bit by hearing and acknowledging the truth. The truth is a burden best borne by a community, rather than by one individual or group. If we all tell these truths together, even those of us not affected by them directly, they will become lighter. We will share the weight of these revelations, rather than ask a few to keep on carrying them for us. 

Prayer: God, I pray for prophets. I pray that the fire you have shut up in their bones would be let out. I pray you would entice and catch more of us with the uncomfortable truths our world would rather ignore. Catch me, too, and help me be a friend and ally. Amen. 

   

Acts 4:8-13 If We Are Questioned Today

Observation: Peter and John  have created quite a stir in the Jerusalem Temple by healing a man who from birth was unable to walk. When questioned about it, first by the crowds and then by religious leaders, they take every opportunity to give credit to Jesus' name. They didn't do this by themselves.

Application: I think today we draw too firm a line between the natural and the supernatural. We are loath to give God credit for something that seemed to happen by coincidence, or by human ingenuity. We tend to only think of God in the extraordinary, the one-in-a-million, the things that just could not have happened without God opening the heavens and moving some stuff around directly. In the day to day, however, Bart Simpson's dinner prayer mirrors our attitude: "Dear God, we paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing."

After denying Jesus three times the night before the crucifixion, Peter clearly wants to make the rest of his life count. The healing he has done is indeed extraordinary, and can't have happened without God's help, but even so, someone who had walked a different path than Peter had might have wanted to take the tiniest amount of credit. Maybe for saying the right prayer, having the right attitude, or believing enough? Peter is having none of it. From here out, all glory, all credit, all honor go directly to the name of Jesus Christ.

Albert Einstein said something beautiful: "There are two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle." Today, like Peter, I want to give credit where credit is due: for the big things but especially for the small things, for the extraordinary but much more the ordinary, wherever healing or hope take the tiniest foothold on the slippery slope of despair, I want to call out the name of Jesus. For me, there is no other name to describe the salvation I see all around me.

Prayer: Saving God, thank you. Help me see the ways you save me each day. Help me put your name on them. If I am questioned today, may all my life proclaim the name of Jesus. Amen.

Psalm 86: Help!

Observation: There are a lot of songs like Psalm 86 in the book of Psalms. It's a cry to God for help and deliverance from enemies. There is no story or historical context provided, and that's probably on purpose, so it can serve anyone anytime who needs it: "In the day of trouble I call on you, for you answer me." 

Application: This type of Psalm reminds me of that classic Beatles tune, "Help!" Until very recently, I just thought of that song as just a catchy tune. But as my son has become more interested in the Beatles' music, I've given it another few listens, and what's interesting is they actually wrote a hit song about their own prison of unprecedented fame. Their freedom, independence, their ability to have even a moment of silence or solitude anywhere, anytime, is gone, and they don't know how to get it back: "Help!" 

I can't say I relate to the fame part of that, but I definitely relate to feeling accosted by a constant flow of information. In an age where we may not need deliverance from a flesh-and-blood "enemy", I find myself calling to God for deliverance from the tidal wave of worries, obligations and concerns from just paying attention to today's world. The prayer of the church has often been "Help!", and it is not always answered by God actively saving a passive people. Sometimes deliverance means the ability to keep our cool, to remain focused on God and on who we are in Christ, and to do just one thing today--not everything, but maybe the first thing--to start healing God's world.

Prayer: Help! Help me, God, and anyone who is worried or anxious today. Give us the ability to unplug. Help us live fully in the moment, and in this day. Deliver us from oversaturation by all that is wrong. Show us one thing that is right, and help us take part in it. Amen. 

John 1:29-34 Would I Know Him?

Observation: at the beginning of John's Gospel, before Jesus says a word for himself, he gets a pretty stirring introduction from John the Baptist. John calls him "Lamb of God" and "Son of God." He says Jesus ranks ahead of him because he was before him (which he must have meant in a spiritual sense, because John was in fact older than Jesus and began his ministry first). He claims the Holy Spirit has descended on Jesus and remained there. But also, twice John claims "I myself did not know him." This is weird, because at least according to the synoptic Gospels, they are related--their mothers are cousins--and John famously jumped in his mother's womb when the two pregnant women got together. This is a mystery, but just taking an educated guess, maybe John means he previously didn't know Jesus for who he is--God's Son, the Word made flesh--and now that he does, he's making up for lost time. 

Application: Above is a rendering of Jesus as he might have appeared in the first century, based on remains of first-century men of that time, and men who are native to the region today. We know almost nothing about Jesus' appearance, except that apparently he looked similar enough to his disciples that Judas had to kiss him in front of the temple guards so they'd know it was him. My point is: I'm not sure anyone, even his closest relatives, would have known who he is--who he really is--just by looking at him. John admits he didn't. 

And if even Jesus' family didn't know him when he was physically there with them, I'm pretty sure all of us two thousand years later will need some serious guidance from the Holy Spirit to know him in the ways he shows up in our lives today. Christians seem pretty excited to point to something we like and announce to the world, "Here is Jesus, this is his doing!" But that's a risky thing to do. I'd even say that we can't know Jesus--where he shows up in our lives--without God the Holy Spirit revealing him to us. I'm sure we'd all like to believe we would have been the special ones, like John, who would have been smart or observant enough to know him for who he is. But without God's help, it just does not happen, then or now. 

Prayer: Jesus, help me to know you, both in the places you have promised to show up--when your followers gather, when the Good News and your Meal is shared, and when the poor are cared for--but also in the places where faith helps me see you in my daily life. Amen.  

Exodus 30:22-38 Holy Things, Holy People

Observation: In this passage, the Lord gives Moses a special recipe for oil to anoint the holy tent, all the temple utensils, and Aaron's family of priests. God also gives a recipe for temple incense. Interestingly, the oil is to include myrrh, and the incense is to include frankincense. The Magi knew what they were doing when they chose these gifts: they imply holiness. God makes clear that these recipes are set apart from anything ordinary, as are the things and people they touch. They are holy. 

Application: Holiness has gotten a bad rap of late. The worst insult you can lob at a religious person is "holier than thou." Worship planners have tried hard to make liturgies accessible and understandable by visitors. We (rightfully, I think) try to encourage our congregations to be more "come as you are," and while I would never discourage worshipers from putting on their "Sunday best" for church, I strongly discourage our folks from judging those who don't. Church culture is changing. 

A lot of this is very good. Insider language and insider practices are a huge roadblock for a world that needs to hear our message of how much God loves them. It does not add to the beauty or sacred nature of a liturgy if we intentionally do not explain its meaning to those experiencing it for the first time. If the church wants to engage new people, we have to be clear about what we do, and why.

Having said that, it is still important to set some things apart. Whether we're worshiping in a cathedral or a living room, God has given us ways to set apart the time, and set apart the people who spend the time together. We're not just here for a fireside chat between friends: we're here for the words of eternal life. We're not just here for a snack, or even a family meal: we're here for God's meal of victory over sin and death. This should feel special, and some aspects of it should even feel mysterious, whether you're doing it for the first time or the ten-thousand-and-first. It is alien to our daily experience. It is other.

Holiness is not about sinlessness or perfection on our part. Christians' lives are not "holier" than those of other people. We're sinners just like everyone else. Holiness is just organizing our day, our week, our year, in such a way as to remember that God is beyond our grasp, yet God has taken hold of us. 

Prayer: God, thank you for setting me apart for your Holy People through baptism. Thank you for anointing me with oil and sealing me with your Holy Spirit. Help me to set some of my time apart--and to invite the world in a meaningful way into that time--so that we can know you are beyond our grasp, yet you have grasped hold of us.      

Psalm 110: Until I Make Your Enemies Your Footstool

Observation: This is a psalm of victory for a king that may be for a coronation: " The Lord says to my Lord, 'Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies your footstool.'" In the New Testament and later Christian tradition, this was read as Jesus' crucifixion, in which he is literally "raised up" above those who wish him harm, and by dying for them, he wins the ultimate victory over death. 

Application: This is what victory looks like: not violent conquest, but self-giving love. Willingness to look to all the world like a catastrophic failure, to be mocked and humiliated, while the true victory remains hidden. Today I am just grateful that Jesus was willing to be lifted up for me. 

Prayer: Jesus, help me to lift you up in how I live my life. Amen. 

James 4:1-10 You've Got to Pick a Pocket or Two (Or Not...)

Observation: The epistle of James breaks down the source of sin and division so simply. It's all about money. Murder, disputes, conflicts, it's all about wanting what we don't have, and taking advantage of our neighbors to get it. But James's alternative is so simple: if we need something, why not ask God?

Application: I'm reminded of Fagan's song from the music, "Oliver": 

In this life, one thing counts

In the bank, large amounts

I'm afraid these don't grow on trees

You've got to pick a pocket or two. 

We may not literally agree that theft is the only way to get by, but we do often live our lives as though our gain is someone else's loss: as though there's only so much to go around, and my having more means you have less. 

But God is generous, and God isn't limited by our human scarcity-based existence. God made all that is, and God can create something from nothing. This year, whenever I'm feeling the pinch, I'm going to commit to asking God, and being honest about what I need. No pickpocketing needed. 

Prayer: God, help me know what I need, and know the difference between my needs and wants. Help me be honest with you in asking for what I need, and relying on your abundance. In Jesus' name, Amen. 

Proverbs 1:1-7 The Beginning of Wisdom

Happy 2018! With the start of a new year I'm going to try to return to the original purpose of my devotional blogging, which was to give readers some brief scriptural insights to carry through the day, but also to do so in a way that can be imitated. Ideally, I'd love to see others take up this same habit in the new year. So I'm going to try be shorter and more to the point (which for me is sometimes a challenge!).

Observation: The book is announced as a collection of Solomon's proverbs, and lists their purpose, including "gaining instruction in wise dealing, justice and equity." And the beginning of knowledge is  "fear of the Lord." 

Application: I appreciate Solomon's words that wisdom doesn't just exist for its own sake  but for "wise dealing, justice and equity." That really can be applied to all our learning, but especially learning from God's word. Jesus gave the great commandment, which sums up all others: love God, and love our neighbor. So the question I come to any text with is: how is what I'm reading going to help me better do that? Not every piece of learning is about just and ethical conduct, of course. But everything we learn that teaches us more about our place in the universe can give us a better perspective with which to pursue justice and love. 

One final insight to go forward with: We can't learn anything until we admit we don't know everything. I think that's hard to do sometimes. Proverbs says again and again that not wanting to learn is itself a sign of foolishness. So the beginning of wisdom is "fear of the Lord", acknowledging that before God, we are small, weak, and short-sighted. This can "clean our slate", so to speak, to open our minds for what God can teach us. 

Prayer: God, help me to be humble. Help me see the vastness of what I don't know, so that what I learn may benefit not just me, but my neighbor and the world you love. Amen.